7 Reasons Why Beer Beats Wine Every Time for this Mommy

April 7th is National Beer Day. Read my posts from past years including “National Beer Day (is No Fun When You’re Pregnant)” and “Beer and Breastfeeding: Best Brews for Increasing Milk Production.”

Fun fact: I’ve never really liked wine. I’ll drink it, sometimes, and there are of course wines I like. But I generally don’t like your run-of-the-mill regular wines like Merlot, Cabernet or Chardonnay. I like some kinds of Shiraz and Malbec and most types of Riesling and Lambrusco (which my husband makes fun of me for though I keep telling him I’ll try really hard to start liking expensive wine instead of the $5/liter stuff I prefer if he wants).

But the truth is, when given the choice, I’ll almost always choose beer over wine. And while I don’t like all kinds of beer (I’ll gladly pass on the kinds that look like pee and taste like sewer water), I can tolerate almost any type of beer from any brewery.

These are the reasons Beer Beats Wine Every Time for this Mommy:All the reasons beer beats wine and why this mommy will always choose beer over wine when given a choice.

Beer is refreshing

Nothing is nicer on a hot summer day (or when my kids get me all hot under the collar) than a beer. Wine doesn’t have that same refreshing quality beer has. Wine doesn’t quench my thirst or cool me down like beer can.

You can’t guzzle wine

I mean, I guess technically you can, but generally wine is meant for sipping and enjoying slowly. And it’s not that I’m trying to guzzle down my liquor, it’s more that I’ve got 4 kids and everything has to be done speedily or all hell will break loose. I can drink my beer faster than I can a glass of wine (though 97.683475% of the time any beverage I choose gets abandoned at the kitchen table after dinner).

Beer is more portable

Wine glasses are just naturally more unwieldy than a beer bottle, can or pint glass. Wine glasses are also harder to hold, harder to balance and generally easier to knock over. If there are kids anywhere near by, I’ll choose a beer vessel over wine glass any time (and don’t bother trying to sell me on your stemless wine glasses, I don’t need any more junk!)

Beer is usually cheaper

Just like wine, there’s some really pricey beer options out there. But generally, beer is less expensive than wine and the selection in the lower price categories is much better. Plus you get more for your money (unless you’re worried about liquor content, which this mommy is not…the less liquor the better for this lightweight!)

Beer offers more variety

Sure, there are thousands upon thousands of different wines available but they all pretty much fall into a few general categories (whites, reds, sparkling, dessert…this is a great graphic if you want to debate the issue) and while the same can be said for beer (ales, lagers, Porters, Stouts…) I find the flavor selection to be much greater. Adding additional flavors to wine is seen as blasphemous and low-class but adding some fruit or other flavors to beer is an art (hence the “craft” brew industry).

Beer is less stuffy

Really, I have nothing against wine drinkers (I was raised by some…who also happen to like beer) just for me, standing around with a wine glass feels fancy. It’s something I do when I’m at hubby’s company holiday parties or at weddings, not something I do at a summer barbecue with the kids or while hanging around with the neighbors while the kids ride bikes on a Sunday afternoon (because, honestly, holding a glass of wine then would be really weird). I don’t judge wine drinkers, if you’re comfortable with a wine glass, go for it, it’s just not my preferred vessel of beverage.

I don’t drink for the liquor

I’ve talked before about my concern over the “mommies and wine” mentality that is so prominent in our culture right now and whether I choose beer or wine, it’s not because I’m trying to “take the edge off” a hard day  or relax at the end of a long week (because if I was, I’d be screwed since my hardest days are when my husband is traveling for work and I will not drink when I’m alone with the kids). I drink beer (or rarely wine) because I like it. I like the flavors, I enjoy the coolness, I like the refreshing quality. I’m not looking to get passed out drunk so for me, the extra liquor content and/or “de-stressing” qualities of wine really don’t matter.

Ultimately, though, I’m really a seltzer water drinker at heart. I could guzzle down that stuff all day every day!

So tell me, are you a wine mommy or a beer mommy? Or do you prefer another type of beverage altogether?


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