Well, I am happy to report that I no longer feel “stagnant” in life as I did when I originally published “Picking a Path” nearly 5 months ago to the day.
My life now feels like a merry-go-round that I can’t get off of. Constantly circling, taking me the same way and the same places I don’t want to go. I try to accept what I can’t change and be positive and do my best in life but then I get handed more sh* and the cycle starts again. I dream about just jumping off but I’m not sure if it’s too risky. Yes, I’d get off the goddamned merry-go-round but what if the consequence of jumping is worse than the sh* I’ve got? But really, how can you compare apples to oranges?
The grass is always greener, right? Except when it’s not and you can’t know for sure until you get there. And what if there is no grass at all? Where does that leave you?
So you ride the merry-go-round, desperately seeking the grass, wondering every time you come around if you’ll finally see a soft place to land. How long do you ride, wait and hope?
And really, how much can you give of yourself before you lose yourself?
This is such a refreshingly honest post…and all too familiar. I feel like I’ve been on this same merry-go-round.
Hugs to you. This too shall pass. Eventually, it will be safe to jump.